What’s Your Dream?

Over the years I’ve asked the question “What’s your dream?” to hundreds of people—friends, new acquaintances, seat-mates on planes, waitresses, cab-drivers. Two things I’ve noticed in the process:

1. They always tell.
2. Their eyes go up and to my left.

Occasionally someone will rattle off her/his aspirations right away, but that’s rare. Most hem and haw a bit before they get into it. Others seem to be making it up on the spot. I think the question gets anyone thinking.

Asking people about their dreams makes them into storytellers. I’m always careful to listen carefully and show respect and belief in these stories. I encourage them, and many have said that telling their dream makes it seem realer and more possible of fulfillment. Plus, I often share an idea or refer the dream-teller to a book, article or person that might further their aspiration.

A second question I often ask, if it’s appropriate, is. “What have you done or are you doing to make that dream happen?” This is not to put people on the spot, but I’ve got a coach’s mentality so I enjoy giving anybody a little "cosmic goose" along the way.

I’ve also used the question as a training exercise, having people get together in pairs and take turns asking and answering the question. Some interesting things have come out of that. Some have had their work teams and families share dreams. One man reported that he’d gone home, told his wife his dream, and asked her about hers. “Neither of us knew the other’s dream,” he said. “Now we can support each other in making our dreams come true.”

So, asking people -- even those you know well -- about their dreams can be revealing and rewarding. Why not give it a try?

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